"Why do you dream of this world that doesn't exist for everyone else?" and "There is no one else like you.." These are false accusations to me. It sounds more like a scream for help and a wish for everything to be more than they are able to see or wish for. When the argument is that the local papers are all you ever read and the news only portrait and project what they want. I have to ask you to stop watching and start feeling with your heart again, stop letting your brain necessarily be your most important organ in your body. We understand that the truth of who we are is more intricate than I sometimes are outing to you or the rest of the "world". It was no surprise that all the fuckups didn't show until all the kids had grown up was it? Our attention span just isn't that good, especially in our time. I let you think you did, but the truth is that you do not confuse me like you might like to think. The truth is far more than that, it's wider and it's outside of your box.
Sitting at the table, eating breakfast, lunch and dinner with the same people get you into a certain mood, a certain way of thinking doesn't it? Did you forget to think that you can do anything in your life, that the strength lays in you? You looked at me like I am an amazing person with an amazing life and a perfect free lifestyle. (You were right but I don't always agree myself, but thanks for the compliment) Instead of making it your way of living you are to scared to take the step yourself. Thank you anyway for living your life through mine, I mean this and say there is room for everybody. Wikiality is however that I am no different than any other person I have ever met, except from my choices. This all depends on how much you let other people steer your wheel. Like I have told you: some people get scared of me. At latest today while me and a friend was going for a walk I saw people look at me, scared of themselves; they didn't even take the chance of meeting me and turned on their heal just to walk in another direction, away from the truth. Facing our fears is the only thing you can do to put things behind you and know this to be true. I also met open people of course, people that stopped, shook my hand and thanked me for being me. Listen to yourself, remember that I am you!
The reason for me to write is because there is more to the world than what you tell me you think there is. The world is wonderful and full of love, but when everything else is clouded it's hard to see what really is. I will take away your shield, that I can't really help any longer, not if I am to let myself be me. You may make as many excuses as you won't I won't stop you. You may even try to hide and try to protect yourself. It is not my right to stop you from feeling - either love or hate, but I will tell you my stand and point of view if I need to. The love I feel for you is real and honest. Whoever you are - I do love you. Whatever you do; never blame me for your false feelings, cause I'm being nothing but honest with you. Judge me as much as you want but as I write my "I's" you know it concern yourself as much as yourself(!) It's no more than the flight of the bumblebees.
"Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger."
-Franklin P. Jones-
Sometimes the river overflow with water. It just let go of the energy and a wave flush people of their rocks. If you don't know how to swim this might hurt in the beginning. Cause of course it makes it hard to breath and you do have to take a breath once in a while. You can not however try to make the river stop. Take tree breaths and your body relaxes like you should. Continue by doing some meditation and you might get some of the answers you are looking for. I ask you this however; don't pick just the truths you like to believe in and oversee the rest of them, cause you do feel whenever you are making a choice whether it is right for you or not. Do not make this a bad thing - and don't judge others for doing something else than you - they have just the same right as you to be themselves regardless of how painful that is to watch.
You asked why I dream of a world that doesn't exist. I answered you but I don't thing you caught the answer. You thought I answered just for myself. Like mentioned we are the same, all of us are and time will show this truth too. You told me I was the ultimate dreamer, a person that will never find his way, but still you hoped for me to do just that. Why don't you give yourself this gratitude? Why do you limit yourself? By reading only one book in your life it will make this book part of you like "reality". Then again that book is written by one person only and by only having one other souls view on your truth I do feel that this put you very much in a small box instead of entering the entire universe like we are meant to. Look inside yourself and gain access to the whole library. Love is the key.
You're the five hundred twenty five thousand
Six-hundredth person to tell me that
No one could ever love me, I'm crazy
And that may well be
- Jay Brennan -
Judge me if you have to, but I do know you and I judged you first. Don't read between the lines where there is nothing to read. Don't twitch my words for something it is not. Being blunt is my persona and if you don't like that is fine with me. To let your sour stomach hit me in the face is lower than what I expected from anyone and when this happen I choose to look at it as an confused action, and I forgive you. Nobody can hurt me by being confused and out of place. We don't have to take in anything, what I say, feel and write is out there for you take if you want it and since I don't believe in coincidences I do believe that you are here for a reason. Just don't make a conclusion until you have read the whole story. We are equipped with two eyes and one mouth which tell us that we are to see the double of what we speak of, I sometimes feel I have seen too much, for that I forgive myself. If you need confirmation, use your nose - when all tree agree, make a statement.. or ask the questions you need to make one - but never spread fear where there is supposed to be love.
Let's build positive energy together, It's amazing how we can be unique just by being ourselves,
Jack
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